Seeking Fulfillment

I spent a lot of time thinking about my own feeling of fulfillment in life today.  I thought about the things that I need to feel fulfilled and I realized that I wasn't doing a lot of them.  Some people are lucky enough to feel fulfilled in their jobs; unfortunately, I am not one of those people.  On some level, I feel comfortable with my job because I am writing and I am surrounded by great people as well. However, there are other things that are really important to me that I haven't been doing lately and today I tried to figure out why.  I compiled a list of those things and made a promise to myself that I was going to do them.  These things include, but are not limited to the following:

• playing my violin again
• BLOGGING MORE! 
• going to yoga 
• painting 
• volunteering and/or getting involved in a political cause 
• getting outdoors more (hiking, biking, walking, etc.)
• write more and possibly try to get something published

The first one, playing violin, is extremely important to me.  I will never forget how playing an instrument made me feel in high school.  And when I picked it up today, I also realized what an amazing gift it is to be able to read music.  Not everyone gets to learn this skill in life and I am very grateful that I have it.  I think I need to cherish this talent and hang on to it.  I don't know why I avoided it for so long, but for some reason picking my violin up again scared me.  I see so many people that avoid the things that make them happy, but I can't seem to figure out why exactly.  I know that I did feel scared, but I can't figure out why it scared me.  The thought of participating in violin lessons and playing in front of people again still scares me, but I know I need to try.

Lately I've been feeling like something was missing in my life and I couldn't seem to figure out why I was feeling that way.  I am extremely blessed in so many ways at this point in my life. I am surrounded by amazing people who care about me, I love my life in the city, and overall, I am a happy person.  After wasting entirely too much time today trying to figure out what was wrong with me and why I was feeling this void, I realized it was because I wasn't doing the things that I really love, the things that make me feel fulfilled. I'm not sure how these things got away from me.

I think we all want to feel fulfilled in different areas of our lives... personally and professionally.  We seek to feel fulfilled in love, in wealth, in friendship, in our careers, and sometimes spiritually.  And we all also measure fulfillment and success in different ways.  I feel pretty successful in a lot of ways but I need to keep focusing on the things I really need, and the things that make me happy.

I'm going to refer back to this blog, and this list, and make sure I remember these things and how they make me feel when I do them.

Lead with your heart... sometimes it gets confused about what it wants and what it needs, but it will eventually steer you in the right direction.